Impressionable freshman need YOU!

Well folks, I have been selected from amongst thousands of candidates to be a Freshman Foothold mentor. What is this you ask? Well, I'll tell you. Freshman foothold is a program that is sponsored and organized by Multicultural Student Services at BYU. This entails an overnight event in which around 150 multicultural freshman are taken to Spring Haven lodge up Hobble Creek Canyon for an overnight activity with devotionals, workshops, dances, and presentations. I was selected to be a mentor of 12ish wonderfully optimistic/naive Freshman for this activity which will take place next week. I am told that I was selected primarily for my awesomeness, which is substantial.
Now, for those of you who know me (I'm looking at you politicchic), you are probably cringing internally and questioning whether or not the Freshman Foothold selection committee is composed of sadists, psychos, pirates, and ruffians. Probably. But that doesn't change the fact that I, and therefore you, are in a position to impact/scar the next generation of BYU tadpoles.

I am planning on printing up a list of REAL HELPFUL advice for each of my little buddies (there will be girls and boys). I am going to be putting advice that will really help them during their time at BYU.

This is what I would like from you: One thing that you wish that you'd have known about when you were a Freshman that you didn't learn until later.
We're looking for the best tips, tricks, ideas, and philosophies- NOT the standard 'get involved', or 'do the readings before class' type of advice. That's common sense and I am sure they will get that from other sources. I need your combined wisdom to make their experience as worthwhile as possible. The focus of the workshops is relationships- between a student and roommate, professor, opposite sex, and other students.

Extra credit: I am also going to make a mock 'Worse Case Scenario' cards to hand out to the kids in my group. They are supposed to be funny/realistic. It will have a scenario written on the front of the card, for example:
You come home late one night to your apartment (around 1 AM) and find your roommate engaging in 'petting' with their significant other. WHAT DO YOU DO?

Then on the other side will be something like this:
A) Yell at your roommate and throw a chair at them.
B) Apologize and offer to be lookout for them and run interference with other roommates.
C) Curl up into the fetal position and cry until they go away.
D) Throw a bucket of ice water on them.


Anyway, something along those lines. If you have a scenario idea, email me. They are supposed to be silly, so no worries there, and The idea isn't to give them an acceptable solution, they can think of that on their own, but to get them to think about things in a humorous way. Thanks if you help, and if you don't.... well. Fine, be that way.

5 Greats of the 80's

The other day at work I watched an 80's movie that I had never heard of before. It is called 'Big Trouble in Little Tokyo'.
It Was Awesome.
Kurt Russel. John Carpenter. Demons. Kung Fu. Ridiculous. Amazing.

This reminded me of many great 80's flicks. Here are my current favorite five action comedies of the 80's:
5) Big Trouble in Little Tokyo


4) Romancing the Stone
Micheal Douglas when he wasn't old and creepy. Danny Devito. Villains with crocodile pits. Suave mambo dancing cut scene.


3) The Goonies
Little Asian kid from the Temple of Doom. Chunk. Villains falling on their delicate bits chasing the heroes. Great pirate parallels. Sean Ashton. "Hey you Guys!".


2) Who is Harry Crumb
"I've been so thoroughly trained that I don't even have to think before I speak". Chasing a plane on a stair car. Best use of Bonnie Tyler's- 'I need a Hero' ever... Period. Tic Tac Toe on a strangers stomach. Brilliant. Fat Guy Hero.


1) Better Off Dead
John Cusack, Blowing up Moms. "I want my Two Dollars". How to pick up trashy women. Testicles/tentacles. Skiing montage. Van Halen Claymation Hamburger.




It just dawned on me that there is no such thing as a top five for awesome 80's comedies. As I review my list, these movies have flooded my mind:
The Three Amigos
Fletch
Airplane
Breakfast Club
National Lampoon Movies
FERRIS BUELLER
Caddy Shack
Spaceballs

*Sigh. Why do movies suck these days? This is an open invitation to share your fondest memories of 80's cinema.

Bald like me.

When I was 19, the first indication I ever had that I would one day be super bald was when my girl friend at the time gave me a super short hair cut and afterwords said, "I think your thinning out on top.". I scoffed at the time, sure that since my grandfather on my mother's side had always rocked a healthy head of hair, that I would as well. I was wrong. Apparently, the genes that I got from Big Steve, this guy:

were stronger than the others. Fortunately, I don't mind being bald. I never cared much about my hair when I had a lot of it, and I don't much miss it. There are times when I wouldn't mind, say, combing a wolverine style doo like I used to, but at least I don't have to comb it at all.

Baldness: not a problem. I've been told that my head handles the baldness well. That's good to hear.

So, who else is bald out there? Here's an incomplete list:
Jason Statham
Samuel L. Jackson
Michael Jordan
Michael Clark Duncan
Lex Luthor
Kojak
Bruce Willis
Bulls Eye
Mr. Magoo
Yul Brenner
Vin Disel
King Pin
Dr. Evil
Yoda
Patrick Stewart
Winston Churchill
Sean Connery
Billy Corgan
Steve Austin
Andre Augassi
Pac Man
Shaq
Montel Williams
Kyle Gas
Paul Shaffer
Moby
Hitman
Dragon Ball characters; Teeyen, Krillin, Piccolo, Freeza etc.
Michael Stipe
Damon Wayans
Charlie Brown
Ghandi
Turk from Scrubbs
All of the Ninja turtles
Mr. Clean
Jessie 'the body' Ventura
Stephen Covey
Pop-Eye
Ed Asner
And many more. Fill free to add those I don't remember.